| groceries at my house: | lettuce, oatmeal, milk, water. |
| me: | i think im finally gonna start eating healthy! |
| groceries at my house: | look pumpkin cupcakes!! and barbecue chips, oh did we forget the million chocolates yeah that too! |
wanna hear a funny story? today i was at the airport minding my own shit getting a starbucks and then this random ass dude comes up to me and says “are you famous” and im like “….no” and he’s like “ok thanks” and walks away. GO ON WITH YOUR LIFES.